New Pal for You!

Maybe up until this point it has all been a rehearsal.  With the impending New Year's holiday, my motivation is getting a boost, and why not grab onto that annual hope wagon?

Since this blog began, I have:
*practiced eating well and mindfully on and off.
*rehearsed my sweet moves of exercise (maybe not so sweet...) on and off.
*established goals on and off.

And now it is all coming together because of my friends.  E, J, and Samm introduced me to My Fitness Pal online:  www.myfitnesspal.com

It is free and actually makes logging exercise and food fun.  "What?!  Shut yo' face, Krystal!"  And I'm here to say that yes, I think it is fun.  Either I am extremely lame, or it actually does make it more fun, or maybe perhaps it is a combination of the two...

None the less, I love it so far.  It's been a lot of fun and seeing my friends on there motivates me.  Logging in the calories and seeing that I can burn some of them through exercise motivates me to get off my chair and EXERCISE!  I have no idea why, but it just makes the mysteries of weight loss seem more tangible and under my own control.  For that reason, I'm going to stick with the site (I took a few days off due to holiday cookie bliss, and now I'm in it for the long run!)  I invite you to join too if you're interested in getting healthier/losing a few pounds, and would be honored to stay connected with any of you on there.  (krystallbooth at yahoo.com if you want to send a friend request through the site)

Sorry if this sounds like some sort of craptastic infomercial stuff, but I felt that I had a responsibility to uphold in sharing this site of awesomeness! lol  Cheers to New Year's and all of your new goals whatever they may be!

Dieting With Jesus

Are you ready for the annual cycle of Christmas celebrating through indulgence and New Year's guilt and repentance?  Have no fear, children, I have just the thing to get us through.

 Advertisement Found: 
"Dieting With Jesus Magnets!

Dieting With Jesus… because that ass needs a miracle! The Lord is our shepherd and he's thinning out the flock.
*Your body is a temple. Fill it with salad.
*Work those buns anywhere.
*Fat jeans or skinny jeans? You decide.
*Omega-3 fatty acids are a blessing for that tummy.

Magnets measure approximately 2 inches wide x 2 inches tall."

Originally I found this image on Vic the Vicar's blog (http://www.victhevicar.blogspot.com).  Vic's entry for these magnets is hilarious!  I highly recommend the read (posted on December 4)!
Then I found the advertisement for these blessed little things on perpetualkid.com.  Imagine the joy upon the face of a child when opening these up on Christmas morn! ...or hopefully someone in the family will like them...

That's a sweet headband, Jesus!  I think I will go workout!  Thanks again, my Man/Spirit!

Juices is the Reason for the Season!

For my Christmas gift to myself this year, I bought a juicer.  I recently watched a documentary, "Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead," in which a man goes on a juice diet for two months and loses 93 pounds.  Although only drinking juice for two months isn't practical, we can definitely take some advice and include it in our diets every other day or so.

If you're like me, breakfast is usually a chore.  I've just never been hungry first thing in the morning.  Now I can throw some random fruits and vegetables in the juicer and ensure I have a healthy breakfast to kick-start my metabolism before my busy days (and apparently it's better for me than coffee, although I still can't give that up completely).  It's fun to experiment with different kinds of juices. Here's a picture of my concoction from today - orange, sweet potato, ginger juice (it's also fun to say).

While I know I won't lose 93 pounds over the next two months, this will definitely help me with my own weight loss goals just in time for those pesky New Year's Resolutions.

The Biggest Loser Finale!

Tonight is the finale!  The end of it all!  I don't know if you've been watching this season of "The Biggest Loser", but I know I'm not the only one of my friends who promptly reaches for ice cream or a candy bar on Tuesday nights to make the viewing that much more enjoyable.  Wrong?  Yes, but for crying out loud, during those certain challenges with mounds of doughnuts and all the talk about food isn't just tempting the contestants!

Last week, we found the final three contestants:  Ramon (won his spot on the finale through winning the marathon), John, and Antone.  I guess it is the battle of the boys this season, and I was sad to see Becky and Vinny not in the final three.  The two of them just seem like such big-hearted people, but of course it's only reality tv.  Do we really know these people?  No.  For all we know, Becky and Vinny could be evil-doers in their communities by nightly dumping over  Miss Mabel's trashcan, taking bats to mailboxes, egging the Reverend's house, and setting the town square on fire.  This behavior surely wouldn't warrant a prize of such grandeur.

Then again, the title of "The Biggest Loser" and the cash prize isn't exactly determined by good behavior.  (Oh, we love to hate and love the contestants of reality shows and label them as "good" or "bad"!  In fact, I still harbor animosity towards the ultimate villain, Omarosa, from The Apprentice and that was years ago!  Lame, but true.)

I don't want to damn any of the contestants, but I would like to post what Antone said last week.  He said, "I'm really sick of John to be honest with you."

I'm excited to see what happens!  Cheers to our journeys and finding inspiration (even if it comes with a side of ice cream every now and then).

A Sampling from a Smorgasbord

Exercise TV on Cable...a blessing from above found on On Demand.  Seriously.  There is about every kind of workout found on this On Demand channel.  There's walking, kickboxing, yoga, cardio, dance, and weight training/toning workouts.  Some of these are almost a full hour, and others are ten minutes.

It is an exercise smorgasbord!

Lately, I've been trying out the "10 Pound Slimdown Kickbox" and the "10 Pound Slimdown Yoga" that are led by Chris Freytag.  The kickboxing surprisingly doesn't have a lot of kicking...hmmm.  It is a 40 minute workout and I know this because there is a daunting little clock in the corner of the screen that counts down the minutes.  Here is my experience with the workout...

Minute:Second/ Thought
39:14  Okay, here we go...so glad I'm making myself do this.
38:05  This feels great - not bad at all!
36:33  My legs do not want to stand after those squats and lunges...
35:28  Chris Freytag is crazy - appears to be on crack.
34:00  I look like an ass.
28:00  I'm going to die.
23:12  Pretty sure I shouldn't have heard that sound coming from my ankle.
18:29 Jiggling, jiggling, jiggling...again, so glad no one is watching.
16:00  Water, water, water
13:21 I am POWERFUL!
11:33  Did the music just speed up?
7:45  Dear Lord,...!!!
5:32  I AM IRON MAN
4:13  Shouldn't we be cooling down, Chris?
2:20 Cool down...finally.

I DID IT!

Within five minutes of finishing, I suddenly forget that it was challenging at all, and say, "That wasn't bad at all."  I don't know if it's my ego at work, or convenient amnesia so I do the workout in the future.  This is why I decided to break down the minutes so you have an honest perspective. 

I honestly love the Extreme Yoga workout - the one that is 20 minutes.  It's perfect and feels great after the kickboxing.  It makes the total workout last for a full hour and is a great stretch after the kickboxing since the cool down is lacking.

What workouts have you enjoyed...or have been making yourself do lately?  Any suggestions?

Fort Clog

http://www.indianasnewscenter.com/news/local/Fort-Wayne-Comes-In-Second-For-Most-Likely-To-Clog-Your-Arteries-134796093.html


...but at least we're optimistic!

What is it about Fort Wayne that makes the second place city for clogging our arteries?

Here are a some things Fort Wayne has stacked against it:

Lack of sidewalks and bike lanes
Abundance of chain restaurants
Lack of great public transportation
WEATHER!

Any of these things is not a great determining factor in and of itself, but when put together they pack a punch!  Instead of focusing on these negatives though, I'd like to point out some great things I've noticed about Fort Wayne.  Such as:

The Rivergreenway which is ever-expanding;

the amazing people who live there that continuously inspire others with the lives they live;

(for me, these people are especially Dana and Dawn, but there are countless others!  I am in awe of you!)

And also our dear Samm, who quite smoking this year, currently lives in the supposed clog-forming city of Fort Wayne (I have yet to master this though I now live in a "healthy" city).

Fort Wayne is changing for the better, and this little study just shows that the city structure needs to change in order to support its citizens better.  We could focus on the negative, but we are optimists!

*Someday there will be a city layout that allows people to easily get around the city without a car, whether by foot, by bike, and aided by an improved city transportation system.

*Someday there will be an more restaurants that focus more on the food quality (healthy,local, organic) rather than the quantity, and more options for buying locally grown, and organic foods that are convenient and reasonable (Trader Joes too!).

*As for the weather, well, Fort Wayne does not yet own a weather machine as featured on a Smurf episode, but know that when other people around the country complain about their weather by saying, "If you don't like the weather in (insert city or state here), just wait five minutes", they have no idea what they are talking about.  :) 

P90X in P.I.N.K.?

Did you happen to catch Dr. Phil today?  He featured a new diet and exercise program called the "P.I.N.K Method" for the full hour.

It seems that the whole thing can be summed up as P90X for women...because women all like the color pink, especially on sets that look like back alleys or the set of a porn shot in an industrial park.  The barbie pink bubble letters in a street art style make me feel right at home.

So their whole marketing gimmick is a copy of another one...but the color pink adds that touch of femininity that makes women feel like, "Heck yeah - I'll be wearing bedazzled rhinestone pink g-strings that show over my skinny jeans in no time!"

Okay, so maybe I'm being harsh.  If it helps people feel confident and get healthy, what's the harm?

I have done a little research about it - here's what P.I.N.K. stands for:
P - Power
I - Intensity
N - Nutrition
K - Kardio?...Cardio.

I really hate that when people do that with Cs and Ks...but whatever...if I start complaining about that, I'll be that much closer to turning into Andy Rooney.  I better choose my battles wisely.  Afterall, maybe they were just simply trying to make people feel more comfortable.  Since they are all fit, thin, and the type of women other women are 'supposed to hate', they have to show some flaws in order to make others feel comfortable.  What better way than bad spelling showing a sign of poor intellect?  Genius, laddys, simply genis!

Here's a clip from YouTube about the P.I.N.K. Method:

The kit is $67.99 if you pay in one payment (saving 15%), or two payments of $39.99.

The biggest red flag that came up during the Dr. Phil Show was that the creator, Cynthia Pasquella, made the claim that it will get rid of cellulite completely.  She said it did for her.  Don't you dare tease me, Cynthia.  There is no cure for cellulite - you can minimize the appearance of it, but to say that it gets rid of it completely is a red flag statement.

So, maybe this will be a big hit, or maybe it will be a quick-to-go fad in the market of weight loss products and systems.  There's going to be people who have great success with it, and there are going to be people who do not.  Anything that helps one get exercising is a good thing, I'm not going to rain on anyone's parade if they try this out.  If it works, it works, and that's great!

However, I'm never going to love the color pink being shoved down my throat due to gender norms, and I probably will never feel comfortable in an environment that reminds me of a cheap porn set.

Barbara Is A Goal-Making Guru!

Somehow, some way, I have not completely ruined the progress.  I have gained 1.6 pounds, and I am now at 167.6.  Not as bad as what I thought it could be...(I was imagining 20).

As you can tell, a lifetime spent of going mostly up on the scale and rarely ever down has messed with my head.  I am out of tune with my own body.  If you told me that I weighed 50 pounds more, I would believe you.  I am out of touch with weight and what I feel like...especially since I've been ignoring exercise and eating mindfully for about a month now.

I don't really know what my weight goal even should be.  I have "wobbly bits" that I would like to get rid of, and the cellulite fairy definitely has blessed me with all sorts of fun celestial designs.  I feel as though I will know my goal when I reach it, which I'm thinking will be around 150.  I will not be defeated by a number though - in the grand scheme of living, who cares?  As long as I feel good, energetic, healthy, happy, balanced, I wouldn't care if the scale told me 350.

 Somehow, someday, somewhere we shall all feel amazing and healthy in our own skins.  There's a place for us - we'll be in tune with our health and bodies.  We all need hope for whatever we are needing or wanting from life.  Oh, dear friends, this is to you! hahahaha!  Enjoy the laugh and/or singing this loudly at your computer screens!

As Barbara sings, perhaps I will answer those questions...

Somehow:  Exercising 5 days a week however and whenever I want (including Dance Central!woohoo) and feel more connected.

Someday:  I shall set a bit of a goal right now - lose ten pounds by January 12th (birthday present to myself) in hopes of feeling more energetic, healthy, connected and confident.

Somewhere:  I shall climb the overlooking hills over Portland and throw my arms up in Rocky style celebration.

How would you answer those questions for your goals, whatever they may be?  You may have been knocked down before too, but forget about that nasty self-talk that many of us are so good at.  Let's do this!  Who knew Barbara was such a goal-making guru?

We Have a Blog?

Oh my goodness, WE SUCK!!!

hahahahahahaha!

Okay, to say that I've been disciplined and got back on the wagon right after my last post would be false, false, and false.  It's safe to say, I've had other things "on my plate" (see how I snuck that little stupid joke in?...).  Anyway, I've been crazily working on new artworks, website stuff, working and LIFE.  Well, I've been quite foolish about health lately, and I don't want a kick in the ass that is punishing before I get back on the damn wagon. 

SOOOOO, in the meantime...do you have any pumpkin pie left?  Apple?....

Again, let me remind myself - I do NOT want a big kick in the ass to get me back on track.  Meaning, I do not want to somehow gain 40 pounds in over night for 100 nights straight becoming some medical mystery.  I do not want my left butt cheek to come down with a case of elephantitis.  I will say, if any of that were to happen, hopefully I would laugh and make dumb jokes about it, but seriously, I do not want a huge slap in the face saying, "GET HEALTHY!"  I think right now, that's where I'm heading if I keep ignoring this blog and our quest to get healthy.

Speaking of ignoring, I've been ignoring the scale.  Not that the scale should be the only determining factor of this whole thing, but it certainly keeps me honest.  I've hidden it under the sink and haven't looked at it for weeks now.  This will end tomorrow.  I'll be weighing myself to see how bad the damage is.  Hopefully it is not too too bad...

We're all ok.

Since quitting smoking, almost 5 months ago, my clothes have taken on minds of their own.  My sweaters have become somewhat deceiving, my button-downs somewhat estranged, and my jeans - my jeans have become downright bitches.

Since I quit smoking, my clothes have all shrunk.

I don't know how it happened.  One day, I was happily puffing on a cancer stick, oblivious to the repercussions of abruptly throwing in the towel and the next I was 15 pounds heavier.

This photo

is a bit of a celebratory photo.  I don't care how much I've lost since starting this blog.

In fact, I've gained about 15 pounds.  Fat isn't funny, but neither is constant stressing about weight.

15 pounds.  That's a lot.  But when I start to think about the weight of the world - it's really nothing.

15 pounds.  It's life and death for a supermodel.  Thankfully, I've never been a supermodel.

15 pounds.  How many botox injections is 15 pounds?  I've never had one.

15 pounds.  It's worth a lot more in the United Kingdom than it is in the United States right now.

15 pounds.  It's insignificant.  Especially if I choose to focus on the rest of me.

We don't do that enough.  We focus on the small percentage of ourselves that didn't live up to the expectation we place on ourselves when we're excited about change and wonder where we went wrong.  Perhaps we go wrong when we expect ourselves to be perfect.

We're human, and while I'm not making excuses for my gaining weight after quitting smoking - I am acknowledging that I am just that - human.

And I'm happy to be me.

Fiercely Fighting Flab!

Fierce, right?  Yeah, well this is my action pose response to the war on the flabby.  Tyra would be elated...somewhat smizing?  Maybe just a little?

Okay, so maybe I'm not exactly photogenically gifted, but you get the idea, don't you?  I have lost some weight - still around 10 pounds lost so far.  I have also been sick for the last two weeks and now am finally feeling better.  It's good to have some energy back, now it's about spending it wisely.

I'm getting back on track.  I was inspired today when one of my best friends called me and told me that she joined the Weight Watcher's online program earlier this week.  I'm excited for her and I know that I needed a little kick in my arse to get going again.  So I am.  (Thank you, girlfriend O' mine, you know who you are!)  PS - Samm is doing the WW online thing too now!

Beginning tomorrow I will be back to the Tracy Anderson cardio dance and mat workout.  HOORAY!  In all honesty, I have missed it tremendously.  I am no longer "Consuela" - I found a different job and now need that exercise to be found outside of my work.  I am back to planning for it, and so Tracy Anderson's workouts are the answer once again.  I'm looking forward to spinning around like the Tazmanian Devil and jumping nonstop as if I've had a case of Red Bull.  Oh yes.  I'm back on the fighting flabby bandwagon...with FIERCEness.

I'm going to follow Tracy's recommendations this time by doing both dvd's at least 5 times per week.  I feel that I have worked up to that now and my body can handle it.  SOOOooo, it will be not quite 2 hours of workout for 5 days a week.  It sounds like A LOT, but really 10 hours out of 168 hours in a week is a small sacrifice when it comes to putting more time on our life clocks.

Coughing Burns Calories! Bring on the Pizza!

I cannot deny that it has been quite awhile since we last posted...we've both been dealing with the sickness that's going around.  Samm and I may be in different parts of the country, but our lives often correlate.  Amazing how we always manage to do that, but here we are and both of us have been sick for a week or more.

I have managed to forget about weight loss during this time, though I have kept an eye on my weight.  I'm staying strong at 166 - I guess my body has established a plateau of some sort.  I've been eating whatever my appetite has instructed...I'm not about to deny it pizza if that is what it wants.  I'm sick!  That's my excuse!  I already ate an apple and some orange juice today, so that is more than enough to make up for it.  Right?  Right!

I've never been one of those people who come back from being sick and are down ten pounds.  One of my good friends in high school had mono for a ridiculously long time our junior or sophmore year.  It went on for definitely a month.  I can't say I wasn't jealous.  To not have an appetite would be such a relief. 

I've always thought of the people who lose weight while being sick as the lucky ones.  I could be exploding for a week long and the scale will not quiver in the least.  The number will not change easily in either direction...maybe that's because I am still eating and allow myself the freedom of choice...
Ice cream for dinner?  Why not?  I'm sick!  Never ending shrimp?  Why not?!  I'm sick!  It's the perfect excuse to indulge. 

Oh!  Gotta go!  The pizza's here!

Spandex for $145.00! How Tracy Has Lost Her Mind in a Big 80s Way

I heard that Tracy Anderson was going to have a online chat session today on a Metamorphosis forum to answer questions from the masses about the program.  Out of curiousity, I went to the Metamorphosis website and began looking for the forum.  As always, I got sidetracked with other fancy links and saw that she was selling a few items of apparrel.  This is my finding.

$145.00

REALLY?  Perhaps she is a bit out of touch with economics.  Perhaps they are made of mysterious fibers that remove cellulite?  No...they are made of polymaid and spandex.  Also, aren't they a bit Big 80s in design?...I think I remember WWF wrestlers like Macho Man or The Hulk wearing similarly patterned pants, but what do I know about fashion?  Then I found this.

$25.99

80s Heavy Metal Rocker Halloween Costume

Includes:  Not only the pants, but also 2 scarves and a necktie

Proof positive that I haven't lost my mind...they are Big 80s and overpriced.  Just sayin'.  Not to mention that the Halloween hot pants cover the entirety of both legs instead of only upper legs, hence using more fabric.  It's all about value, people...

Though I'm willing to bet that at Kmart stores around the country there are random pairs of pants similar to this that have been in circulation on the clearance racks since the 80s that no one wants to buy.  They may be the running store joke and are priced for $.80.  The cashiers are waiting for a person to bring them up to the counter so they may all cheer out loudly and laugh wildly as the lucky buyer exits the building.

Gweneth Paltrow was recently criticized for being out of touch with the economic conditions of others as she would make overpriced suggestions for purchases and treatments on her Goop site.  Since Tracy Anderson is her trainer, I'm willing to bet Tracy acquired advice from GP about how to price her pants AND that GP owns a pair.

French Women Don't Get Fat: Revisiting Mireille Guiliano's Book

Two years ago I read this book and loved it.  I enjoyed reading it and the ideas and attitudes it represented towards eating.  I recently picked it back up during a nice bubble bath and ended up wanted to drown my copy of it and then light it on fire.

Do you know those women that are really good at insulting you as you sip coffee together or saying things that make them seem so much better than you, but you don't realize it until the conversation is over and you're driving home getting furious as you replay the conversation in your mind?  Older women are very good at this if they acquire the skill.  European women are EXTREMELY good at this at an earlier age  - or at least that has been my experience.  Their fancy accents must throw me off and I think that they say rude things such as "You're legs are very round" or "You're buttocks is big" due to their lack of english speaking experience.  Later, I realize that I shouldn't have given them the benefit of the doubt as they use words such as "impeccable", "vivacious", and "conceptual"...clearly showing mastery of english.  Those bitches...they're much smarter than me.

But anyway, Mireille Guiliano is one of those women.

Upon our little revisit, I opened her book and became furious and snarky.  I couldn't help it - I had to grab a pen and start writing in the margins.  I was translating her old-lady-insult-language into what she is actually saying for all of us simpleton American women...and now may I present to you the translations for your benefit...

fat isn't funny's translation of French Women Don't Get Fat

...or at least parts of it

Today we shall cover Chapter 8: Liquid Assets.  Mireille writes about the importance of water and how Americans do not get enough, but French people do.  Please read with an aristocratic accent in your head, whatever that sounds like to you.  For me it is always a nasally British accent with my nose in the air and half-closed eyes...I wish I knew of others, but it's my go-to accent for pretending to be an aristocratic, smug person that is good at being condescending.

pg. 156:  About her coworkers:  "But rarely do I see any of them at the water cooler, the proverbial American gathering point for goofing off." 

FIF Translation:  The Water Cooler Discussions do not happen since you all do not drink enough water.  That saying is a lie, therefore you are all liars.


"The contrast with our Paris headquarters couldn't be more stark.  Each day a one-liter bottle of water is distributed to each office and cubicle, and if that's not enough (and it isn't!), there's a room always filled with them, where anyone can go to get more.  When we have meetings, bottles are set up all over the conference room."

FIF Translation:  Each day a water fairy drops little bottles of love in our PARIS office.  It's just one big effing water Utopia.


pg. 157 On growing up in France:  "Everyone starts the day with a glass of water.  At every meal, there is always a big bottle of mineral water on the table.  People help themselves throughout the day - and  it isn't kept in the fridge."

FIF Translation:  It is just one big water orgy of health here, especially compared to your drought of health and culture.  Water in the refrigerator? Pew-pew, silly Americans.


pg. 158  On the taste of water:  "In case you were wondering, American mineral waters are considered bland.  Could this hint at why almost two-thirds of the population is chronically dehydrated?  Perhaps, but it surely must explain in part why we import so much water not only from France and Italy, but from dozens of other countries.  It amuses me in American restaurants to be routinely offered water from Fiji - an 'artesian' variety."

FIF Translation:  We French have sophisticated palates, and considering Fiji water as "artesian"?  Hysterical!  I would also quote the Water Boy movie here by saying, " Your water sucks, it really really sucks!", but I lack all humor unless it involves natural yogurt that I culture myself...the shapes of the raisins I like to put in mine can be very silly looking sometimes...I sometimes can see little faces in them.  I can catch details such as this because my brain is hydrated...unlike yours.


pg. 160  On when coffee is served:  "In France, coffee is usually reserved for breakfast and the end of a meal.  We don't drink it all day long as some Americans do; that's an awful habit."

FIF Translation:  You are uncivilized savage beasts.


On tea salons in France:  "While I do notice more tea salons (black tea), I fear their job is mainly to lure tourists looking for another place to eat pastry!" <insert smug laugh>

FIF Translation:  We French business owners outsmart the fat and foolish swarms of foreigners everytime.


pg. 161 More on growing up in France:  "In my home, we were all addicted to herbal teas."

FIF Translation:  As opposed to American children fancying spoons of marshmallow cream.  I believe that herbal teas would be the equivalent to no flavor added rice cakes to American children.  May I reiterate, we French have sophisticated palates.


Continuing her spiel on tea and being a child:  "Sometimes we'd concoct our own aromatic blends and bundle them into sachets, alongside which the bleached supermarket teabags of today seem pathetically sterile and inert."

FIF Translation:  You can try to duplicate my rich experiences, but you will fail unless your teabag is made of 100% finely laced antique silk that has aged through heavy use for at least 75 years.



Well, I guess that pretty much covers Chapter 8: Liquid Assets.  There are a lot of good points made on water's behalf, but I just wasn't feelin' it when I opened it up again.  Perhaps when I read it again I was in an ill-mood due to dehydration.

Thinking Out Loud Session: An Exercise in Priorities and Meaning

-2.8 pounds, down to 166.0...but who cares?

This last week has been a bit of a wake up call.  We lost a friend this week.  Funny how death makes everything else in life look so pointless and trivial.  Weight loss?  Who cares.  Career problems?  Who cares.  Remembering the loved one, honoring them the best we know how, and dealing with the loss by making every moment count with the people around us is suddenly the priority.

It is a reminder of priorities.  Making every moment count with the people around us should ALWAYS be a priority.  If it isn't, we need to make some adjustments.  If we are failing to fully live, we need to make some adjustments.  These adjustments can be made immediately...they do not have to wait until Monday, or the first of the next month.

And then comes the analysis of what it means to live fully, and make every moment count.  What does this mean to you?  To fully live...

1. Cherish people around you, even ones you don't necessarily get along with.  We are in this together.  Try to connect.  Be able to go to sleep each night with the ease of knowing that you loved your loved ones and were even nice to the A-holes in your life...afterall, you may be the jerkface in the his/her life, and perhaps you can break the cycle with each small connection - even if it's just a smile and a "hello".  Maybe it will eventually stack up and you will no longer be mutual A-holes.  It's worth a shot.

2.  Follow your passion.  Do not rob the world of what you have to offer.  Do not let things hold you back.  Keep moving.  Keep going forward even when the odds are not in your favor.  Who says we have to be perfect at what we love to do?  Play guitar, write, draw, paint, plan, knit, craft, clean, exercise, play with Tonka trucks, go to car shows, garden, play games, do puzzles, laugh, tell jokes, sing, whistle, build things, talk to your pets!  Passions do not need to be a serious endeavor - they are what you ultimately enjoy and sets your soul free.  Wherever your passion lies, go there.  Do it, and by all means, have fun.  Chances are it will make you happier and this happiness will be paid forward to someone else without any effort.  It may make someone else's day with what you have done, or the simple improvement of your mood may make someone else's day improve.

There are more, but I want to get to the point of this - after we analyze what it means to live fully according to our own personalities and drives, the "trivial" things creep in and don't seem so trivial anymore.

After all, why are Samm and I doing this blog?  Why are we wanting to lose weight and improve our health?  Because it is supportive to what it means to us to live fully.  We want the chance to be around to enjoy our loved ones and each other longer if that is a possibility.  We want to pursue our passions and see them through as much as we can while we are here.  Suddenly the weight loss thing isn't as trivial as what it first appears.  It is not pointless.  It would mean we wouldn't have health working against us, but for us in order to pursue life. 

All grieving is not created equal.  We experience it's depths differently, and the meaning of the loss is different according to our interpretations and relations.  I'm not saying that after this post I'm going to be all "YeeHaw for Weight Loss" and immediately renewed.  It's not about that.  It's just about finding meaning to our everyday pursuits and re-evaluating priorities.  This is my scramble for meaning, and I hope that by sharing this it somehow helps those who are hurting more than I can imagine for their loss of a loved one.  Love to all.

"You Fat Keep You Warm": Consuela In The Flesh!

It has been awhile since I have seen Tracy Anderson's Dance Cardio or Mat Workout Routines.  I'll be honest.  I do miss her and the routines...even though the music was getting to where Matthew even knew the words and it was driving us both crazy!  I was beginning to create a music compilation to play while I had the DVD on mute that featured Gnarls Barkley, The Cure, and Radiohead when suddenly...

I BECAME CONSUELA.

No, I didn't suddenly get an amazing accent and say, "I noooo" or "I need more Lemon Pledge".  I was hired as a Custodian, and so I get to wear fancy yellow gloves just like my favorite character from Family Guy.  Lucky, right? :)...okay, so no, it's not paying my bills through my artwork, and it's not teaching either, but we do what we do to get by.  Besides that, I have an awesome coworker and amazing Supervisors.  In that regard, I did get extremely lucky!

Since I have become a kindred spirit of Consuela, I have not had the energy to even think about doing a Tracy Anderson routine.  Custodian work is no joke!  It is not very much different than an eight hour workout.  I spend the time with a raised heart rate by walking, bending, lifting, carrying, pushing, pulling, and above all else, SWEATING! 

I lost weight due to this job.  If anyone is serious about weight loss, I would suggest a manual labor line of work if they do not want to workout on their own time. It has taken a couple of weeks for my body to get used to the job.  In the beginning, I couldn't hardly walk the next day until it was time to go back in.  Now, I am only stiff for a couple of hours in the morning, and then I'm alright.  As the week progresses, my muscles get more tired and the weekends are great for recuperating.  I'm hoping with time the tired stiffness will continue to lessen. 

This past Sunday when I weighed myself, I weighed the same as I did the previous week.  I'm not worried.  I know that in the next couple of weigh-ins I will lose more, and this is just how my body functions.  If I don't lose more weight, I will know that it is time to add Tracy Anderson back into the mix, and my body will be prepared for it...though I'm hoping that I don't have to go to such an extreme.  

As for Consuela, here are some of her funniest moments courtesy of YouTube (uploaded by ProductionsPerez):

http://youtu.be/QZP7or7hMS0

Enjoy!

Dear Susan Anton, You Awkward Diva, You!

Oh, Susan Anton and the Slimatics videos of my youth.  Somehow we had a couple of these Slimatics videos in our house when I was growing up, and I believe that this is how I got hooked on Dance Cardio workouts.  I had a love/hate relationship with them.  I loved them and hated them for their outrageously cheesy saxophone music, obnoxiously shiney apparrel, and Susan Anton's wannabe-Mick Jagger moves.  Her moves gave comedic relief, and I couldn't help but giggle a bit during the workout. 

I hated the cool-downs though.  She always looked at the camera and adjusted her hair as if she was the sexiest thing since...sliced bread?  It was awkward and uncomfortable.

Anyway, she was a nerd for sure, which was comforting to a chubby ten year old.  I loved when she made mistakes.  That was the best part of the whole thing.  It was hilarious.  I coveted those parts of the workout.  "Silly fool.  Everybody knows that the grapevine move is next."

Perhaps we should bring it back so exercisers will not feel inadequate next to the fitness goddesses in videos today.  The shiney, annoying spandex.  The sweatbands.  The awful saxophones.  The awkward sequences.  If only Samm and I lived closer.

If you asked me at the time if I worked out to those videos, I would have denied it with embarrassment.  I knew it wasn't a "cool".  But you ask me this now, and I will stand up and cheer!  Susan Anton's Slimatics videos were the bees knees of humourous workouts!  Hellz to the yes!  

Drum roll please...


Hold onto your hats!


I'm down to 168.8!!  That's -4.0 impossible pounds! (5.8 since Aug 14th)

No, I will be one of those people who tell you "this week was better because I did everything right.  I kept track of every calorie!", because that would be a lie.  This week was similar to the ones before.  I cannot explain to you why all of a sudden a body wants to function properly.  It puts up quite a fight sometimes when we are doing all of the right things and still do not see it reflected in emperical progress.  Our bodies can be so stubbornly resistant to change.

Fitness gurus get my [insert "feathers ruffled", or "panties in a bunch", or basically any polite way of saying "pissed off" or "-ing annoyed"] when they make losing weight seem so simple by saying, "It's all about burning more calories than you take in.  It's a numbers game."  Really?  Is it?  Because my body does not go by that simple formula.  It holds on.  It resists.  It fights to keep every calorie packed onto it for an energy savings account anywhere it can fit.  Sometimes it feels like a two-year old with a death grip on a sucker.  You know you're stronger than the two-year old, but it takes a long time to finally pull the chubby, sticky, clenched fingers off the little stick. 

Not that I'm running around stealing suckers from two-year olds world round, but you can imagine...any red flavor especially.

Do I feel different? Yes, a little.  I notice in the mornings that I physically feel a bit lighter...not as much gravity weighing me down I guess?  I've noticed that my stomach has lost some of it's padding.  I don't feel as fatigued during the day as I did before I started exercising more (about 6 weeks ago).  I don't have to rely on afternoon coffee for energy, though I enjoy it when I can.  I have slept a lot better and haven't had any insomniac spells since I started this, which truly is saying something.  There's less time of laying my head on the pillow before I am asleep, and I haven't had to do my countdown trick to get to sleep either....more on that later. 

Bring on Week Six!

Fat Media

This is an advertisement I came across in an artist's blog.  It's a print advertisement from Anabell to fight Bulimia.  They should have included yellow teeth and thin-falling-out hair...it must be a wig, because I don't think a Bulimic of that extreme could grow such luxurious hair.  I think what's more frightening than the doll itself would be the accessories that would come with it.  Accessories are always important when chosing a Barbie.  Just sayin'.

Another interesting thing I came across is a television show called "Supersize vs. Superskinny".  It's on OWN on Monday nights and it's such a crazy show!  One extremely thin person and an overweight person trade their typical diets for a week to come to the realization of how their nutrition is ridiculous.  I would think that this would be dangerous, and it may be, but it is a powerful teacher to the participants.  If you have yet to see this, check it out!  It also has little excerpts of fun little exposes on different topics throughout the show that are extremely interesting. 

Another television show is about to begin too - my true addiction - "The Biggest Loser".  It is once again without Jillian Michaels, which completely sucks, but I will watch it anyway.  Love me some Bob Harper, and it's fabulous when he gets mad enough to drop profanities.  There's something fascinating about that.  Anyway, I look forward to being motivated by that show...I vow to no longer eat ice cream or pizza while watching it this season.  What is with that anyway?  I know a ton of people that eat "naughty" things while watching that show.  Are we just rebels?  We are rebels armed with cake as we watch other people in excruciating workouts sweating until they look as if they went swimming with their clothes on.

I wonder what would happen if we actually did this at a gym as we watched people workout.  It would be a freakin' anarchy!  I would love to see a flashmob do THIS!  Oprah's Michigan Avenue dance mob would have nothing on the cake, pizza, and icecream eaters at a 24 Hour Fitness!

Dramatic Results on a Diagonal!

This is my progress so far that brings total weight lost to 1.8 pounds.  Not bad for FOUR WEEKS of SWEATY HELL.  (*Please note that the math is incorrect on the chart - I left it as a notification of my being mathematically optimistic...some may call it 'challenged'.)

Anyway, after seeing my weak results after a month of hardwork, I decided that perhaps photography propaganda could help.

Note that the chart is the same, but the diagonal angle makes my 1.6 pounds super dramatic.  Fantastic!
(This is not unlike the Before photos of non-smiling slouching people to the After photos of smiling sucking in populations.)

I have been moving around, sweating, eating well, and being diligent.  I haven't been counting my points on paper, though I know I have been in my goal range.  This is going to be a LOOOOONG journey, but as the saying goes "Blah blah,blah ..blah."

I pledge the following for my week:

*  WRITE DOWN my weight watchers points, for crying out loud.
*  Make sure I break a sweat for 5 of the 7 days.
*  Drink my water!!!!  Take multivitamin and Omegas.


....I think I have the metabolism of a 150 year old woman, or perhaps my body is deeply emotionally attached to fat cells.  They picnic together and enjoy long walks on the beach...

C'mon, Metabolism-  You better get going in Week Five!!!

Going Vegetarian: A Red Button Issue

Faced with a wonderful portabello burger, one has to ask the question, "Why am I not a vegetarian?"  Matthew and I went over to our friends' place the other night and they cooked up some big beautiful portabello mushroom caps that had been marinated.  We put them between toasted buns and it was amazing.  I didn't miss the beef at all - they were SO GOOD, that I can not tell you enough.  We also had vegetable skewers of summer squash, onion, green and red peppers - who can resist that?!

They are awesome vegetarians.  I say "awesome" not only because they are awesome people, but also because they do not frown upon our lack of being vegetarians.  You know the type who are horrible vegetarians - the ones who "moo" as you take a bite of your burger, or tell you all sorts of tales of horrendous cruelty as you cook up a chicken breast.  They are not these people.  Instead they are beyond accommodating and considerate.  They realize that the decision they made with their nutrition is their decision alone....they are "pro-choice nutritionists"!  What's not to love about that?!

Growing up, I was never one of those children who frowned at their brussel sprouts.  Instead, the vegetables were my favorite part and I always had seconds.  I'm still that same way - I actually prefer the vegetable portions over meat.  For one thing, meat always leaves this horrible taste in my mouth, and I have to immediately eat chew gum or something sweet to battle that meat mouth.  Yuk.

I have also grown oversensitive to hunting - being raised in a Indiana family of hunters where it was common place to find a dead deer hanging inside a barn waiting to be filleted, my oversensitivity was not expected.  The last few times I saw a deer being loaded up in the back of a truck made tears roll from my eyes.  I can't handle it emotionally as an adult. 

On our move out to Oregon, Matt and I saw a lot of horrifying things from the highway that said a lot about meat production in this country.  Dirty, stinky, and beyond enormous facilities, along with semi-trailers filled with animals scrunched together with feathers flying all over the road.  It definitely scarred us, and we have changed some of our ways because of what we saw.

On a less emotional note, meat can be so expensive.  Many of our meals in this apartment are actually vegetarian without that goal in mind.  I believe that we really could go without meat for a long long time and not miss it.

So why am I not a vegetarian?  Because of the red button phenomenon.  The minute I declare, "I am a vegetarian" will be the day that I can think of nothing other than steak, burgers, chicken, and tuna noodle casserole.  The foods I could not have would be an obsession at all hours of the day, and I would probably find myself eating more meat than I do now.  It would be a full out rebellion against broccoli.  This is one of my flaws of character, and yes, I own up to it.

Sorry if I offended anyone with this post - that is not my intention at all.  I just wanted to share a personal debate that's been going on in my brain for the past few years.  I consider myself a pro-choice nutritionist as well, so no, I will not glare at you or be offended as you eat your deer jerky, I promise.

Love to all -

If You're Eating Right or Hate Gluttony, Do Not Read This

So my week has been filled with failure, new horizons, chicken chimichangas, and pizza.
It was a week of a ridiculous schedule made completely impossible by lack of sleep and then too much sleep...(like Seinfeld, I even out). 

I also ran out of my beloved Cinnamon Puffins that inspire great poetry. 

It was all downhill from there.  It's amazing what havoc occured due to interruptions in my routine.  It was made obvious this week that despite all of my drive to get healthy, I am out of control when I'm not following a schedule.  Not to mention that when I didn't have enough sleep, I knew that I would be reaching for fatty goodness.  In preparation, I walked down to the gas station to buy Donut Replacement Therepy (aka "anything remotely healthy found at a gas station").  I'm glad I picked Trail Mix because I was promptly inhaling it two hours later.  I did have a moment when I looked down at my cupped hand full of raisins, peanuts, cashews, and sunflower seeds and thought, "What the hell am I doing?"  I never thought I'd see the day when I binged on trail mix, but there you have it.

Of course, the week didn't get better eating wise.  I began a physically demanding job this week, and after a single day, my legs were completely crippled from my hips to my heels.  Being unemployed for a year and then just hopping right in with more energized enthusiasm than a body can handle will do that to someone.  I hobbled to the closest Mexican Restaurant to make up for the calories lost.

I refuse to weigh in tomorrow, not because I failed this past week, but because I don't want Samm to feel so bad after I show him that I lost 20 pounds in a single week by eating pizza and Mexican food.  That would be rude.  Don't you agree?  Friends don't do that to friends, especially when he's gone organic and stuff.  heeheehee...actually, I KNOW what I weigh because I feel it.  I don't need the numbers to let me know that I feel all flipflopped around and a mess.  It's obvious that this week I completely backtracked, and did not lose weight or get healthier (although the pizza did have pineapple on it - that counts as fruit/veg, right?).  I REFUSE TO SEE THE NUMBERS.  I WANT TO BE IN DENIAL...so I will be.  :)  On Monday, I can pretend that nothing happened, and I'll make sure I have my damn Puffins, and good sleep. 

Cheers to catching up with the damn wagon.

Rethink. Rewind. Revamp.

I have been playing with the idea that weight loss, for me, isn’t about smaller portions of what I’ve been eating for years.  Instead, over the past few weeks I’ve done a complete overhaul on what I choose to put in my body (although the occasional Twizzlers is still a very real part of my diet).  I have done a bit of reading about all of the chemicals in our food, and although I had to stop reading the book that shall remain nameless (see prior posts), I did get a bit of insight into how our bodies handles those chemically laden foods.  It doesn’t.   Our bodies are not recognizing many of the foods we eat as actual foods because of the trend to replace what’s real with what’s cheap.  We suffer as a result in a number of ways – from not feeling satiated after we’ve eaten to not giving our bodies what our bodies need to carry us around each and every day (I maintain that the occasional Twizzlers is perfectly acceptable).

I recently began an organic local produce delivery in an attempt to eat more fresh fruits and vegetables.  I’m not saying organic is the way to go, but I’m giving it a try.  There's something about eating foods untouched by potentially harmful chemicals and antibiotics that reminds me of a simpler time when drive through windows and 44ounce soft drinks would have only existed in science fiction (early science fiction, maybe?).  So far, I have to admit (although extremely unscientifically) that the food actually tastes much better than produce from big box stores, which is often genetically modified to the point of not really being food at all.  Here’s my first produce order:

I also had some staples like chicken, brown and basmati rice, all natural peanut butter (with peanuts being the only ingredient), eggs, and a few other odds and ends thrown in to get me started properly.  I’ll be updating periodically with updates about my deliveries as well as new foods I try as a result of exposure to several new fruits and vegetables that I never would have thought about purchasing at my local grocery store, such as kale.  When was the last time kale was on YOUR grocery list?  I did a quick Internet search on kale preparation and discovered that many people are raving about baked kale chips.  With kale in hand, I decided to give it a try.

It was delicious and amazingly simple.  In a large bowl, I mixed the kale (broken up into chip-sized pieces with the stalks removed) and just a splash of olive oil, added some freshly ground sea salt, then baked at 300 degrees for 22 minutes.  The recipe I found suggested 20 minutes, but I found that the extra 2 minutes helped the chips get a bit crunchier and gave them a deeper smoky flavor.

Oh, and forgive the low quality photos as my Blackberry's camera is on par with dollar store disposables.  

Oh Dear...Get Thee to a Juicery

Goals of this past week:
*  Exercise 5 days with 2 of those days doubled up to do both the Mat Workout and Dance Cardio by Tracy Anderson:  YUP - Check - Wasn't always the most motivated about it, but I did it!

*Weight Watchers Points on 6 days and the 7th day eat more (Wendie Plan):  I did them 5 of the days, but decided that I should eat more 2 of the days...my Mom sent Matthew Birthday Cookies and there was no way that I wasn't going to partake in baked goods from my fabulous Momalah.

*Water, Vitamins, Fish Oil Daily Intakes:  I completely slacked on water for a couple of the days...and the scale showed it -

The numbers say +1.4 pounds...which means I'm .2 pounds away from where this journey began! hahaha!  For crap sake.

There are plenty of things I did wrong this week - I ate some of the points I gained through exercising, and didn't drink enough water.  I also craved salty goodness...and well, ladies, this does have something to do with what we have to deal with on a monthly basis.  I'm feeling as bloated as Violet Beauregarde when she turned into a blueberry and they had to roll her to the juicery. 

When I think about "bloat", I think about "boat" and "float".  Everytime I feel bloated, I picture a group of people gathered on a shore as they put me out to sea.  They wave handkerchiefs, blow kisses, and call out luck for the voyage.  My swollen limb waves goodbye, as my head struggles to look at them from my ghastly swollen body.  I glide boyantly over the waves into the expansive horizon.  "Bye, bye friends!  I shall return from this journey in seven days!  Thank you for laying the fudge stripe cookies upon my belly - they will surely come in handy!"

Hopefully I will deflate soon - this will surely teach me for not drinking enough water and too much salt!        

Does this deodorant make me look fat?

I'll enlighten you all with a more thorough review of the Doctors Roizen's and Oz's book, "YOU: On a Diet" at some point in the near future (if I can finish it).  So far, readers' waists have been compared to convention centers and the moon, and I'm only on page 75.

Oh, and the accusation that I gained my weight stuffing eclair after eclair down my throat wasn't my favorite moment, either.   I could stand naked in front of a middle school pep rally and not get such insensitivity (although I could get jail time).  I am not advocating streaking your local middle school.

Then, while digging for more pearls among the pig poop in the book, I read another shocker.  Between incessant adolescent and seemingly not-very-well-thought-out similes, the doctors give us a possible excuse for our being overweight - our deodorant, namely deodorant with aluminum (which includes just about every stick of deodorant with an antiperspirant).  Pshew!  For years now, I've been under the impression that I've been carrying extra weight because I love to eat but hate working out.  Thankfully I have something other than myself to blame this on.  Finally!

equals 

Not so fast.  It seems after a pretty quick Google search, there isn't much support for the doctors' claim (they don't provide a citation, either), and, frankly, I'm not sure how much I can really trust them after comparing my waistline to the moon.

THE MOON!

The nerve.

The fact is that a very small number of those of us who are overweight or who have struggled with weight issues can blame the extra pounds on extraneous circumstances.  Again, those people are the extreme minority.  For me, instead of blaming my deodorant, my parents, the cycle of the moon, or President Obama (it just seems easy to blame the president for ANYTHING) for my extra weight, I need to be honest with myself and admit my weight came on from a love of all things starchy and fried, and sometimes nothing sounds better than pizza and breadsticks drowning in garlic butter at 9pm.  For most of us, the responsibility for our wanting to lose some excess weight starts and ends with ourselves, and that's okay.  Own it, and then start taking steps that work for us as individuals to fix it.

He'd Be So Great If Only He Were Thin.

Samm and I have been reading You on a Diet: The Owner's Manuel for Waist Management by Michael F. Roizen and Mehmet C. Oz (Dr. Oz).  This book has truly been amazing and I would suggest it to anyone and everyone simply because of all of the information about the human body.  While I am sure that Samm and I will do reviews of this in the future, there is something that has been bothering me ever since I read it.

pg.170:  found under "Dieting:  Avoiding the Issue"
"For a second, think about one particular kind of person - the extreme example of fat gone wild.  These people are often the stereotypical ideal - funny, kind, generous, charming, articulate, creative, and more brilliant than a perfect diamond - except for the fact that they're overweight.  (We all say it:  'He'd be so great if only he were thin.')  That bothers us."

Do people really say that about each other?  Does it really bother people?  I'd like to think not.  What happened to the idea of being judged "by the content of their character" (MLK)?  I understand caring about one another's overall health out of true concern, but this exerpt takes it to a level of being a judgemental bastard.  If we read this inbetween the lines, the person saying this must be of an advantage weight/health wise, and is judgemental.  They have a bigger battle to be fought in order to overcome such an elitist attitude.  They are shallow because their own character is lacking development, and this will be a detriment to their own quality of life.  They are not seeing others clearly.  Look past the exterior shell - look past the vessels we were born into - our bodies are only temporary facades protecting the soul within.

Anyway, I think losing weight is a lot easier than overcoming a character flaw of being an a-hole, and anyone can be absolutely fabulous at any size or level of health.  I do love this book, but I think this paragraph should be re-written/revised/deleted immediately.

Or have I just been sheltered from this?  Do you know anyone who would agree with this excerpt?  Did I misunderstand it, or do you agree?

Refried Beans and Weight Loss: Krystal's Week One Results

The goals for week one were:
*  Exercising 5 days this week (3 cardio and 2 for weights/toning)  CHECK!
*  Achieve Weight Watchers points 6 days and can use extra points for one day if I want to - (There's a theory backing up this choice- the Wendie Plan)  CHECK!
*  All days multivitamin/fish oil pills and water intake.  6 out of 7 days


I lost 80 pounds of gravity, and am now waif-like.  Thank you, Weight Watchers and Tracy Anderson!
(Insert plastic smile with a gleaming teeth here, complete with sound effect of "ding!)  Okay, now for the real numbers...I lost 1.6 pounds this week and it's a good start. 

I worked for that number.  I mean WORKED!  It definitely made me realize that it's going to take a lot of dedication and determination.  That's alright - I'll do this.  It's time.  I will be like a slug crawling up your arm - slow, focused and consistant.  (NOTE:  I will not be like Mike Tyson and be ferocious with impetuous style and eat your children.)

Relevant Good Thing of Week One:  This burrito-

Made with the following ingredients:

 and

I can't say enough about the Rosarita No Fat Chile and Lime Refried Beans.  They are a true godsend of fiber and refried bean bliss without saturated fat.  Hats off to this little can!  I think it will be on our grocery list frequently in the future.  Matt and I loved it!  SO GOOD!  Also, I have to confess that I'm addicted to Mexican food and if I could I would eat it daily.  This is why I'm so happy about this little burrito of bliss.  You see a simple bean burrito, I see a revelation.

Goals for Week Two:
 *Exercising 5 days this week again, however 2 of the days I will do both the Mat and Cardio workouts back to back (this is what she suggests, however I never did this in the past).
* Achieve Weight Watchers points 6 days and can use extra points for one day if I want to - (There's a theory backing up this choice- the Wendie Plan)
* All days multivitamin/fish oil pills and water intake.
 
Love to all, and thanks for reading!  Now go find those refried beans!  Cheers!

Sub Robs Woman of Cake

This is not my sub...it's a public domain photo I found of a sub at Quiznos.

At the beginning of the week, one of my goals I listed was meeting (not exceeding) my Weight Watchers points for 6 out of the 7 days.  That meant that one of those days I was going to allow myself to use some of my flex points (additional points for the week so I could eat something spectacularly naughty if I wanted).

The week was going great until yesterday.  I made a decision to go to Quiznos and bring home Mesquite Chicken subs and cups of Brocoli and Cheese soup for a surprise lunch for Matthew and I.  I was thinking that the soup would not be the best decision points wise, but I would just make up for that later in the day.  I also thought that the subs couldn't be that bad either because it was bits of grilled chicken on wheat with vegetables.  I realized while eating it that it had bacon, cheese and ranch dressing on it.
FAIL.

I remained optimistic that it couldn't be that bad.

FAIL.

I looked up the nutrition information after my lunch was consumed.

EPIC FAIL.

Mesquite Chicken Sub (Regular)
Calories: 790
Fat: 39 grams...WHAT?!?!!
Fiber: 4 grams

The sub ended up being around 18 points.  The soup was only 3 (to my surprise).
Together that is nearly all of my points for the entire day!!!  It became apparent that I was going to be using my flex points yesterday, though I wanted to save it for something a bit more naughty than a day I ate a chicken sub on wheat bread. 

I should have just ate cake and called it a day...or had someone inject me with a syringe of fat.

Today will be better - I'll look up the points BEFORE I eat something.  Perhaps trusting my intuition was an extremely bad move, but I do finding myself asking how does the sandwich I ate yesterday contain so many calories and fat?!  Do they inject it with fat?!  If I made the same thing at home, I doubt if it would have been anywhere near those numbers.  What exactly are we eating?

Do You Know?

Posted on YouTube by Aames666

(Samm and I did not make this video...which is pretty obvious when you view the content.)

Do you know where you're going to?  You do if you have goals.  For instance, my goal is to someday be in a bikini in an Audi listening to Avril Lavigne and will go through a transition of Vertigo to finally look like Beyonce or Angelina Jolie.  I will wear Victoria Secret and travel a lot.

It's all about goals, people.

The F-Word

Fluffy, voluptuous, big-boned, husky (Dear Jesus, please don’t let anyone see my mom holding up jeans to my waist in the husky section.  Love, Sammy). 

We’ve all got our little bag of excuses filled with make-us-feel-better words sitting somewhere within relatively easy reach at all times.  For some of us, that bag is tucked neatly away next to those several pairs of 32” inseam jeans that we haven’t been able to get past our knees for the past two years because it’s only a matter of time until we’ll be able to fit into them again and jeans are expensive and who knows how long this recession will last and it’s always good to be prepared (I wouldn’t know anything about that).  For others, that bag is covered in the stench of mothballs in the nether regions of your closet where those old college mini dresses went to die but you couldn’t possibly get rid of them because of all of the memories attached of being thin, carefree, and drunk and passed out at that frat house. 

Regardless of where we keep that little bag of excuses, all of those words that we’ve told ourselves over the years mean the same thing. 

Fat.

It’s just a word, but it’s a word that many of us have given far too much power over the years.  Like the words smart, pretty, or a-hole, we too often allow single words to become all-encompassing to explain who we or those around us are.  Don’t fear the fat, because let’s face it – the more we sweep anything under the rug by ignoring it, the easier it is for that to become a bigger problem until it’s such a terrible problem that we begin to ask ourselves, “What’s the use?” and give up. 

To be successful in battle, we must admit that the enemy exists.

Fat.  It’s the enemy, and we’re all ready for battle.

Say it with me – “F you, Fat!”

The Wrath of Water (End of Adjustment Week)

The Week of Readiness has ended...

Exercise: 4 days (Tracy Anderson Dance Cardio 3 times and Tracy Anderson Mat Routine once)
Days of Weight Watchers Zen (achieving 23 points): 5  (I used the 35 points on the other two days, and then some possibly...)
Water Intake:  5 of the days very good, other two just okay.
MultiVitamin/Omega 3 Pills:  4 days yes,...


Goals of the Official Week One will be:

* Exercising 5 days this week (3 cardio and 2 for weights/toning)
* Achieve Weight Watchers points 6 days and can use extra points for one day if I want to - (There's a theory backing up this choice- the Wendie Plan)
* All days multivitamin/fish oil pills and water intake.




Readiness Week in Summary:  The Revenge of Water
Water...I know you are necessary and I know I haven't drank you enough, however you were pretty full of revenge this week. 

First incident of revenge -  I was on the phone with a good friend who was having a rough day.  I was listening thoughtfully when all of a sudden I had to go to the bathroom, and there was no waiting about it.  I only had time to say quickly and in a stressed out fashion while cringing with my hand on my head and sitting on the porcelain, "I'm so sorry, I have to pee."  I was hoping that it would not be loud, while also thinking how rude it was and how rude it would have been to abruptly end the phonecall in the middle of her confiding in me.  It was rude no matter what I chose.  HORRIBLE.  AWKWARD.  EMBARRASSING.  Thankfully, she is a good friend and she understood.  Thank goodness it was not a phone interview or something of that manner.

Second incident of revenge - (this made us even)...I had a physical this week and I was fully expecting to have to do the urinate into a cup trick.  I dutifully drank 2 glasses of water before I left.  By the time I walked into the office to do paperwork, I had that feeling that no one would be delayed because I could not fulfill their requirement.  It was another 15 minutes before I was called...and then after realizing that my eyesight sucks now, it was another session of waiting in a tiny white room with a fancy hopital gown and sheet.  Every minute became more and more unbearable.  The room suddenly was getting warm, I was beginning to sweat as I waited patiently.  All I could think about was my bladder as I pushed back my cuticles and sat there trying to distract myself by looking at the digestive tract poster.  The room was getting smaller.  The lack of color difference between the walls, floor and ceiling made it seemed to want to mess with my equalibrium.  I realized it was all because my bladder was full and overdue.  What was regularly a nice, quiet, calm experience turned into a chamber of Hell. 

The doctor came in after 30 minutes with an apology for taking so long.  I smiled and told him that it was fine, though every question he asked I spoke quickly and urgently.  Finally he asked me to lay back because he had to push around my bladder/stomach area.  I panicked and rapidly blurted, "Okay, but I have to pee right now super bad and it's excruciatingly uncomfortable right now.  I'm so sorry."  That quick slur of words made the doctor move in fast forward and as soon as he pushed on my bladder he knew I had to get thee to a restroom!  Thankfully, within a minute I was dressed and on my way to the bathroom.  They ended up not needing the cup trick at all.

Lessons Learned: 
1.  Warn all people I talk to on the phone at the beginning of the discussion to get that out of the way.  If they hear a tinkling of water and flush and faucet it will be of no shock, and no interruption in sincerity.  Even if it has been awhile since you've talked to Aunt Gladdy or Cousin Mabel - it makes no difference.

2.  A full bladder being pushed on is a way to make hell on earth.